lost

i am at a lost at this new play ground

F U

I think I am nice.
And I think I have a pretty high threshold for shit.
but this is the worst shit.
I am sorry if I sound racist but honestly, I would love to cast the benefit of doubt upon you all but sometimes you guys make it so hard for us to do so.

Don't come accusing me that I "sabo-ed" you.
PLEASE.
The DVDs were given to you all for testing before I went on my bak-kwa and pineapple tarts spree.
No one told me that there was a problem.

And when the DVD jammed last night, don't go blaming the other guys.
Why can't you be more initiative and pro-active?
All that was needed was to clean the DVD and then replay it.
What if NO ONE was around in the office?

Don't come accusing me that I "sabo-ed" you.
Look who's talking.
When shit happens, who will the client scold?
ME.
When shit happens, who will the audience throw oranges at?
ME.

Your job was simply to make sure that the DVD work for the next 119 minutes.
I haven't point my finger at you yet, so don't be so pro-active now.

Shit it la.
I am just a freaking temp staff.
I don't need your shit.

february

I finally spent the most important $35 in my life.
The $35 did not go a pair of jeans or a new bag, in fact it went to 3 places, namely NUS, NTU and SMU.
Yes lovelies, I submitted my application for university! -grins-

A part of me is all tangled up with fear.
What if I am not good enough for either of the schools?
What if I entered a Faculty not of my choice?

I actually went to put Nursing in my NUS choice, can! -shudders-
Whatever it is, I will know when application results come out in early March-May.

This year's Chinese New Year was a bit different.
I didn't do much visiting.
Just like how Weidong puts it, when we younger, the money collected was important to us.
But now as we have all grown up, money ain't that important to us.

Sometimes I do wish that I have a closely-knitted family.
But I guess, God is fair and works in weird ways.
Whichever area I am lacking in, He makes up for it in a different area.
And so, thank you for all my friends.
Thank you for not hating me and still calling me your friend. :)

my mouth very small

There's a dry spell going on.
I have no motivation to work and the endless emails are draining me.
I would like very much to put my thoughts to words but somehow there is this unseen force that is pulling me away from this website and alphabets are just alphabets, unable to form an intellectual sentence.

Does busy-ness kill one's brain cells?
I wonder at times.

But anyways, while some people may say that I have a very big mouth ( when juxtaposed next to my non-existent eyes, yes), in reality, i honestly pride myself as someone who can keep a secret or two...that is IF i find it worthwhile to gag myself and bring that secret to my grave.

And one big secret that I was keeping from all the CHS peeps was this....

AH BOON IS BACK!

:D

That silly girl, i miss her drunkard antics and her boisterous laughter.
Each time she gets on an alcohol high, she will immediately dial my number and DEMAND that I join her at some club. -rolls eyes-

Really, those of you who kept laughing at my drunken state..foaming mouth and sleeping, ought to be shot! Be thankful that at least I don't spout nonsense or go "Sorry eh" x 100000 times or "My love" x 100000 a la Tan Pei Xuan and Vanessa Tan.

When I am drunk, all I do is sleep.
And that is the safest thing you should do.
And your secret is safe with me.
-grins-

an affair

I have a confession to make.
I cheated on a man with another man.
I cheated on Jeremy with Kenji.

Gosh, I am utterly filled with remorse and regret.
I shouldnt have abandoned Jeremy.
I shouldnt have been taken in by the sweet monetary gains Kenji promised me.
I should have waited for Jeremy.
Even though I will only get to see him just before Chinese New Year.

I should have just waited for Jeremy to do his magic, even if it means letting my hair grow so long that it covers my face with grease and dandruff.

I SHOULD HAVE WAITED AND STAYED TRUE TO JEREMY.
Kenji and his assistant kept asking me questions which was very patronising.
Jeremy wouldn't do so. Jeremy asks intelligent questions.

Kenji chose a hair colour for me, only to have my friends telling me that my black roots are still showing.
Jeremy knows what works for me and such problems will not happen!

Kenji kept asking me to go for treatment and then bugged me to do rebonding, just to earn a quick buck.
Jeremy REFUSES to let me rebond because my hair is still recuperating from my past chemical disaster.

Kenji cheated me with a promising hair package but after I walked out of the hair salon, awake from all the drugs, I realised Jeremy would have done a better job at a more reasonable price.

Now I have an ugly mop for hair. Bloody retribution.
-cries-

Moral of the story: NEVER. NEVER EVER cheat on your hairdresser. Jeremy, please forgive me!

nostalgia

I am such a stick-in-the-mud.
I wish time could be rewind and allow me to go back to September 11 2008 because I wanna be on the plane to Wuhan.
And this time I am sure I will not bawl my eyes so crazily out. And this time I am sure I will not have this perpetual longing of getting my ass back to Singapore.
This time, I am sure I will go all out to immerse myself in the beauty of China right from the beginning.


I miss Wuhan and the days there.
But i know times are a-changing and Wuhan today is very much different.
No matter how many times I return, the feeling will be different because not everyone is there at the same time.
Huiting won't be my roomie.
I won't be sleeping Room 901.
Lao Gan Ma's alley food stalls has disappeared.
Some friends have grown distant.
Some classmates have grown into friends.


I guess this is how life works.
You can go back to your first love again.
I can go back to Wuhan again.
We can start all over again.
But nothing can ever remain the same, again.

1517 247 8517, i still remember my China number. -smiles wanly-

heartbreak warfare

Actually I can't believe that I'll be turning 22 in 2 months time and it's 2010.
2009 flew by at such a lightning speed that I ceased to catch up.
I spent 2009 going for parties and parties and going broke.
I actually went for TWENTY BIRTHDAY PARTIES with a huge bulk of it being insane people turning 21. Myself, included.

I pray with my limbs intertwined, that I need not keel myself over twenty first parties this year.
TWENTY leh, my gawd.
No joke.

But honestly, on the whole, I am thankful for 2009.
Because I found myself back then.
I would love to tell you my life story but i reckon it will not interest you very much so i'm shutting up.
Like how I wished Nicholas, I wish the same for you and me that in this 2010,
WE'LL ONLY MEET THE BEST PEOPLE.
because we all deserve a lil' loving every now and then.

:)